Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Day 163: Painting the Town Green

So as you may have known, that before leaving the States, we had joined an organic vegetable co-op. Every two weeks we would drive out to some random person's house and pick-up a box of random fruits and vegetables… our involvement in the program was really quite random. And also before we left, we were talking with my brother about buying a cow… not to graze in our backyard… but to eat. You see, there are farms that you can contact that sell free range, grass fed, hormone and antibiotic free cows. My brother had done this previously, and we were so impressed by the quality and the price… it is based on the hanging weight of the cow, so every cut of meat costs the same… which next to nothing… so if you are willing to upfront he cost of an entire cow.

Anyway, what is my point? In Serbia there is no such thing as buying "organic" fruits and vegetables… because everything is organic. And there is no such thing as hormone/antibiotic free cattle… because they don't use hormones or antibiotics on their cattle.

It is really an amazing concept… and yes, everything does taste better.

Anyway, for people like us… and our ideals in the food we eat… we are living in a wonderland. There are these amazing "green markets" here, which are just like our "farmers markets" back home, except way more elaborate and open every day… even in the winter. But if you come shopping at the green market in the winter time, you better like root vegetables, because you can only buy items that are in season.

How elaborate? Well, besides the myriad of stalls dedicated to produce, there are also a number of permanent structures dedicated to butchers, fish markets, cheese and dairy shops… it’s not just some guy with a cooler full of frozen meat… we are talking about a full blown butcher shop… like the kind in the movies… which pretty much doesn't exist in the States anymore. Think about going to Publix and asking the "butcher" there for specific poundage of a specific cut of meat… what is he going to do or say… "uhhh… everything we have is out in the coolers." At these markets in the dedicated butcher shops… you can request whatever you want… How glorious is that?

Besides these specialty shops, you can also find people selling basic electronics, clothing and toys… so there is a flea market vibe in some sections of the market at well. This is pretty cool.

Now, you have to remember… which I always remind you in these blogs. We speak very limited Serbian. And frankly, the green markets, are not where you go if you want to find a vender that speaks English… although we have found some. So… on our first trip to the green market Serena and I figured out a full proof plan. We would only go to vender who had their prices posted. In Kenya, it is a bartering society… and the last thing we wanted was to try and barter not know in the language… or knowing what the price trends were. So, we would go to a marked vender, point, and say "Jedan Kilo"… which simply means one kilogram. The vender would weigh our order, hand it to us, and rattle off some number so fast that we could not understand. But, that lead us to the second part of our plan. We would smile, nod, and hand them 200 Dinar (less than $4.00) and then wait for our change. Which we always got. 200 Dinar seemed to be a full proof number… we never looked like idiots for giving them to little money… we only looked like idiots when we gave then 200 Dinar… and the only needed to give them 50 Dinar. But the point is that no one tried to take advantage of us… that we know of. It was a great experience… after all of our shopping and paying for a taxi cab both ways… we only spent about $26.00 US Dollars… and had plenty of Beets… and Pears… and Turnips… and Carrots…

Oh… and walnuts. There were some venders there that specialized in chopped nuts. And we wanted some walnuts. But, who needs one kilogram of walnuts… so we tried to ask for a half-kilo of Walnuts… without knowing how to say it vocally. So Serena held up one finger saying "Jedan" and began using another finger to strike through it… or cut it… in half. Eventually, we had the nut vender doing the same thing… and then he started saying something to us in Serbian… which we can only imagine was "oh, you want a half-kilo of Walnuts you strange America nut eaters…" Well, our assumption was correct. We communicated with the international symbol for a half-kilo.

All is right in the world, hurray!

Friday, December 26, 2008

Day 159: Pip, Pip, Cheerios

So, if you have been reading… you will know that Grayson has an obsession… pillow fights. Pillow fights and chocolate. Two obsessions: Pillow fights, chocolate… and naked time. Three obsessions: Pillow fights, chocolate, naked time… and the Backyardigans. Four obsessions!

But the sake of this story… there we need only to focus on the forth: "The Backyardigans"

For those of you wondering, "what the heck is the Backyardigans" I will allow IMDB to fill you in with the details:

"THE BACKYARDIGANS is Nick Jr.'s animated musical adventure series about five high-spirited young (probably early elementary school age) friends, who rely on their vivid imaginations to embark on amazing, epic adventures. In every episode, the backyard transforms into a new fantastic, photo-real landscape that serves as the backdrop for completely original, story-driven musicals. Broadway-caliber music spanning a variety of genres and cutting-edge 3D dance choreography propel the stories forward. The series will inspire children to sing and dance along with these lovable characters and stretch their imaginations as they climb up mountains, slide down glaciers and sail across oceans."

Sounds fun huh? It's actually a pretty darn good show… and for TV really promotes imaginative play. Which leads me to my Grayson story:

The other day after work, Gray and I were hanging out… and out of no where he started calling me "father". "Father, would you like to play pillow fight with me." "How are you today Father?" "Hip, Trip, Cheerios Father." "Would you like a cup of tea Father." And yes, he pretty much all of those things back to back. And I don't know what it was that he said… because he was a little hard to understand… and then it dawned on me… "Grayson, are you speaking in a British accent?"

Now, personally, I don't think Grayson knows what a British Accent is… but he said yes and quickly offered me "a spot of tea". Some how he had gotten the lingo down and was pretending to be British. That's my boy!

So, of course, I throw my accent on and Gray and I have a wonderful time making each other laugh while pretending to be British… all the while, I am wondering how we even started this game… and most importantly… how Grayson ended up being the one who started it.

Well, that question was answered a little later. After dinner Grayson asked to watch "The Backyardigans"… as he always does… and there are four episodes on each disc… so if you are not careful, after one ends, another episode will start right away… and at the start of each episode they tell you the name of the backyard adventure you are about to watch. To my dismay… and Serena's… we here a character call out the title of the episode, "The Great Tea Party"… and then see Grayson cheer, just up and down on the couch, and start shouting, "Hip, Trip, Cheerios"… or rather that was what we through he was saying… Grayson thought he was saying "Pip, Pip, Cheerio."

And after his excitement of the episode was over, Grayson turned to me and said, "Thank you Father."

BTW: Santa could not resist. That sweet little boy was surprised to stuffed animals to all five Bandyardigan characters. And yes, that “Santa Claus” is more than happy to pack all five of them into a backpack whenever the family leaves the house… because that sweet little boy doesn’t want to leave his best friends behind.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Day 149: Survivor, Serbian Style

If there is one thing that I have learned in my first month is that Serbia really knows how to do reality TV. More specifically: Survivor. Yes, my friends… somewhere on the remote islands off the coast of Panama, 16 Serbian strangers were stranded and forced to create a new society… while voting each other off. So, what makes Serbian Survivor so much better than American Survivor?

Are the challenges harder? Are the personalities of the contestants even more outlandish? Are there less stringent rules and regulations in regards to nudity on television? Do they eat each other rather than vote each other off?

No… I don't think so… Yes… and unfortunately not.

The reasons that Survivor in Serbia is so great has nothing to do with the actually game play (as I call it now)… because there is “game play”… and then there are the extras. In the States, all that you see is “game play”. You see them on the island… living… working… backstabbing.

But, imagine. Survivor meets the "Monday Night Football Halftime Report" meets a Jay Leno style variety show meets "Meet the Press".

I know what you are thinking… "how wonderful!"

Now, before you get too excited you must remember that I have no idea what people are saying… it is all in Serbian, without English subtitles. Yet just like American Survivor… I am riveted. Even more so as I try and figure out this bizarre new format for the show. Let me put it this way… the running time of an episode is two hours… BUT, just like in the State, you only get one hour of “game play”. Bear with me.

Now, my first experience with the show was a couple of Sunday afternoons ago. We do not have many English stations in our temporary house and I was flipping through the channels and low and behold… I found Survivor. And they all talked funny.

I watched it for a little while and then got distracted playing with Gray and making lunch… all that sort of fun stuff… but I left the TV on all this time. Eventually I ended up back in the living room and Survivor was over… now there was some Meet the Press looking talk show. At least that is what I thought it was until they went to a clip of a "Reward Challenge" and then cut back to the panel… and continued to cut back and forth for some time… after a while I came to realize, through body language, that the panel was arguing about strategy. It then became apparent as they cut of various clips around camp and day to day life on the island that the panel was discussing the actions and motives of various contestants in the game. Then all of a sudden… the panel stopped talking and Survivor came back on. I had just witnessed a Serbian halftime report… for Survivor!

Okay… now that was just cool… BUT... it got better. When the show ended and they voted someone off rather than eating them… the program cut back to the panel who interviewed the person who was just voted out… they showed clips of his ultimate downfall… and then… this is what caught me off guard… they introduced a band… who then played about two songs on a very badly designed survivor looking set. Imagine the design staff of Survivor decorating the music stage on Saturday Night Live (but half the size)… but due to budgetary constraints, they could only afford about $25.00 and were only approved to buy from Party City’s “luau” aisle. That was the set. It was absolutely brilliant. Finally rolling credits rolled.

Now, I should point out that the actual “game play” segments of Survivor Serbia look exactly the same as the American version. And frankly, the American Survivor did three seasons in and around Panama and it is quite obvious that they are using all of the same locations… and probably the same structures for tribal councils and the more elaborate challenges.

But as far as Serbian TV in general… everything pretty much looks like the set I described.

They have Big Brother… which I can’t stand no matter what country I am in… and it looks pretty much the same… except it is on ALL the time. It’s like the Truman Show here… 24/7.

Also, there is something that looks like Dancing with the Stars. But, I have been told that it is not… but it looks like it. But image the room that American Idol uses for its first round of auditions… three judges sitting around a table… and about 50 people sitting on bleachers… cheering for people dressed up in ballroom dancing garb… that never dance! Folks, I have yet to figure this show out… and like every other TV program here… it is on all the time. And yes, I have yet to see anyone dance. Every time I flip past it… the same kind of pomp and circumstance that marks the end of an episode of Dancing with the Star is going on. Couples are standing in rows… couples are asked to sit down in what appears to be the safe area. Then they stand up again and join the rows… the Serbian announcer reveals what seems to be a winner… and it keeps going… it’s almost like a round robin of eliminations… “okay you beat Jelena and Miroslav… but, will you beat Branka and Vladamir?” It is all so strange to me.

I wish I knew more Serbian.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Day 136: Jetlag, The Devil

A Schutz Family Flashback:

Man, jetlag is terrible. It is so much worse than when we went to Amsterdam last year. But then again, the circumstances were very different. A year ago we were going as tourists. When you are touring you have limited time and you don’t want to waste any. And I also had the luxury of starting my trip visiting my cousin Winke, who I had not seen for a VERY long time. So it was only natural to fight the desire for sleep and socialize. The day I arrived in Amsterdam I stayed up until around midnight their time and woke up at nine in the morning: a normal night of sleep. That was all I needed and I was ready to go for the rest of the trip.

Serbia on the other hand is an entirely different experience. And I think it has a lot to do with the fact that we are not here as tourist, but as residents. We also don’t have the social stimulation that you would get when visiting old friends or family. So, the first couple nights were brutal.

On our first night I finally couldn’t take it anymore around 7pm. Serena and Gray had fallen victim to a nap earlier in the afternoon to they were not quite ready for bed, but I just couldn’t hang, so closed our blackout shutters and went to bed. When I woke up, I felt great. By that time Serena and Gray had joined me in bed and I slipped out to start breakfast. And that is when things went terribly wrong. When I stepped out into the living room I realized it was still dark outside. I walked to the kitchen to find out what time it was… it was midnight. I had slept for five hours and it was only midnight. There was nothing else to do but watch late night Serbian TV… so I did that for a while… and then watched a movie (I packed a DVD player into my suitcase, thank god)… and about halfway into the movie Serena and Grayson woke up and joined me. I want to say that we all went back to bed around three or four… and reads… all I can say is that we should have set an alarm… we woke up again at 12:30 in the afternoon.

This ritual was repeated on night two. Except this time I woke up around 10:45pm after only sleeping a little under four hours. Serena and Gray of course eventually joined me… and we all went to bed again around four… and then woke up again around ten in the morning (which was much better).

So, after two miserable nights, I was finally able to get my jetlag under control on night three. Serena and I stayed up to watch a movie and we vowed not to go to bed until nine o’clock, which we successfully accomplished. Now, I did wake up again at midnight, but I would let myself get up and finally got out of bed around six in the morning. And that day was my first official day of work; so fortunately, I was pretty much locked into a schedule at that point. Hurray for me.

Serena and Grayson on the other hand is a completely different story. It has been just over a week now and they have not been successful in adjusting… quite yet. It makes sense though; they don’t have a schedule yet. There is not much going on to motivate a normal sleeping schedule at this point. But we’re working on it. We didn’t give Grayson a nap today so we are hoping to get him down at a descent hour, the only problem is that Grayson hasn’t slept through the night since we’ve arrived… but he will… eventually.

We are feeling much better now.

-JP

Monday, December 1, 2008

Day 134 - Sounds of Serbia

Serbia seems to be two totally different experiences, depending on whether or not your eyes are open or closed. All in all I would have to describe Belgrade as being rather industrial. Due to the fact that most Serbs still use coal for heating, winter time brings with it a very nice smoggy haze. That haze though, is a perfect partner to accompany the images of some of the more unique architecture scattered around the city: the buildings damaged by the NATO bombings in the early nineties. Although the sites are a bit eerie, the remaining presences of these buildings are almost poetic, yet I am not terribly sure of the reasoning behind it. Are they a reminder of consequences of aggression? Or the opposite, a reminder to the rest of the world of how they once victimized the Serbs. Either way, the buildings remain. And the Serbian government has no intention of rebuilding them… at least for the moment.

I was the first to wake up on our first official full day in Serbia. It is safe to say that we slept in… but I got up at the perfect time. I had just left the kitchen with a glass of water when I heard the strangest thing. It almost sounded like very loud music coming from the apartment below us. I froze trying to figure out what I was listening to and wondering how often our neighbor was going to annoy us with their music… but as my ears started to adjust I realize that I had been completely wrong in my calculations. I followed the muffed sounds to our back porch and swung open the doors. And there it was… the more glorious church bells. I couldn’t help but just stop, close my eyes and listen to my first beautiful sounds of Serbia.

Later that day, the three of us decided to take a walk and get a grasp of where we were in reference to… well… everything else around us. We ventured out a few blocks when we realized that we are living right around the corner from a soccer stadium… and quickly realized that it was game day. We didn’t figure that out by the lines of fans making their way into the stadium… or from all the street venders that had set up shop for the big day. No, we realized it was game day by the precedence of about one hundred police officers lining sidewalks out front. I had always heard about Europeans and their fanatical love for soccer/football, but I had never witnessed, first hand, something like this. We were so taken back by the police presence that I refrained from taking a picture of a restaurant called “Bart’s” that had a picture of Bart Simpson, himself, pointing the way in… a picture that I still want to get for Jeff.

We decided at that point that our time for exploration was done for the day. We were not interested in getting missed in with the soccer fans… not with Grayson. To we headed home. The game started a couple hours later as it was getting dark. It gets dark here at 4:30pm. And that was around the time the crowd began to cheer for their team. I was amazing to listen to. Imagine an entire an entire stadium cheering together… but not the kind of cheering that we know in the States. This was not the sound of random cheers… or the periodic screams that come with doing the wave… and at no time did I ever heard the word “fence”. No, the Serbian fans were singing. They were all singing together to support their team. And their voices in unison echoed through the chilly night and into our apartment. It was astonishing. I truly believe that everyone should have the great privilege of listen to European soccer fans. Then again… I have no idea what they were singing… honestly, it could have been about a fence… but I’m not going to focus on that.

-JP