Day 1067: Congratulations to Kerry!!!

REF: Day 756

Wow… WOW!!!  I have WONDERFUL news!!!!

Back on ‘Day 756’, during International Friendship Week and smack dab in the middle of ‘The Chair Saga’ I told you all about my good friend Kerry… if you’re a new reader, I included a reference link to the post at the top of this one.

Anyway… about a year and a half ago Kerry contacted me and said it was time for a change.  She wanted to know about the Foreign Service. 

Actually, I get emails like this all the time and it’s a pretty normal occurrence among my Foreign Service friends.  I’m probably contacted three or four times a year by friends or friends of friends who are looking for a change and feel the need to ‘window shop’ a somewhat outrageous career change.

Of course, Kerry’s inquiry was different.  She’s always different… heck, I’ve known her for almost 15 years now and the one thing I know about Kerry is that she’s not going to waste her time with something she’s not genuinely interested in.  You always know what you get with Kerry… and not much BS comes with it.

Well.  We talked about it.  She thought about it.  She went to careers.state.gov and added her name to the waiting list for Specialist application announcement.  And that was that.  Time to wait.

Now, I’m pretty sure Kerry isn’t the only person I’ve talked to about joining the Foreign Service who has actually put their name on the mailing list.  However, I’m pretty certain Kerry is the only one who has actually applied when she received the application announcement… last September… almost a year after putting her name on the list. 

This isn’t a fast process… it’s a commitment.

In April she was asked to go to Washington, DC for an interview… her airfare paid for by her current boss.

Two weeks later she received her security clearance.

Three weeks later she received her medical clearance.

One week later she was officially offered a spot in the September orientation class.

Now… there is something Serena and I have been telling Kerry privately throughout the process… this long stressful nerve racking process.  A process that makes you second guess who you are and why you’re going through it.  Who in the world subjects themselves to a multiyear application process?

That said, the one thing we kept reiterating throughout the process was how proud we are of her.  Win or lose, we’re very proud.

Simply applying to be part of the Foreign Service is a very tough personal step to take; especially if you’ve spend most of your life living in the same place (like both me and Kerry).  Win or lose, the significance of the attempt… the willingness and strength to willingly walk away from everything you know shouldn’t be ignored. 

And frankly, feeling proud for a friend of 15 years… who you met in college… is a very special feeling.

So now… publically.  Serena and I would like to shout it from the roof tops of Belgrade and Islamabad… (although I will probably ‘shout’ with my inside voice… so I don’t draw too much attention to myself):

Kerry, you have been an incredible friend to us for the last fifteen years and we are incredibly excited for you, and most importantly, we are incredibly proud of you.

PS: Readers, if you will be staying at the Foreign Service Ghetto in Falls Church in middle to late September, let me know.  It’s never too early for someone to have a sponsor… and I’m sure Kerry would love a friendly face when she arrives.  If so, email me!

Day 840: Personal Narrative

So, I’ve been helping a friend of mine with her State Department application and I dug up my old application essays.  Although, most of the hiring process for the Foreign Service is confidential and we’re not allowed to talk about it, the initial application requirements for FS Specialist job are publically posted on www.usajobs.gov… and one of the elements is a series of job specific essays AND a ‘Personal Narrative’.

Looking back at my old application, the essay that caught my eye was my ‘Personal Narrative’, which is nothing more than a “Hi, this is who I am, why I’m awesome, and why I want to join your club”… it’s basically, you in 5000 characters.

Anyway, I’ve been doing this whole blog thing for quite some time and I figure there are some new readers out there thinking, “Who the heck is this guy?... and when is he gonna learn how to proofread?”, so I thought it would be fun to update my ‘Personal Narrative’ and post it as a reintroduction of sorts… so… here it is:

“If my memory serves me correctly, I spent most of my childhood vacations in the backseat of a 1970-something gray Chevrolet station wagon while touring the United States with my parents and older brother. By the time I was twelve years old I had been to every state except for six. Today that number stands at four.

What I remember most about these trips are not the endless hours arguing with my brother, now a patent attorney, about who was trespassing into whose personal space. It’s not the color my mother’s (mathematician turned housewife turned math tutor) knuckles as she reached for the dashboard each time she felt my father was unsafely tailgating. What I remember most about these trips is the obsession my father (accountant turned IBM salesman turned real estate agent) had with playing Willie Nelson’s ‘On the Road Again’ each time we saddled up for the next leg of our epic family adventure. At least that’s what I hear in my memory when I envision the picture of my distant youthful self standing in four states at the same time at Four Corners Monument. The song also plays in the background as I recall driving three very hot hours out of the way of our original destination to visit the anti-climatic Craters of the Moon National Park. Willie Nelson continues to sing as my flash accidentally goes off in the darkness of Wind Cave, as I visit Alcatraz, Pipestone, Bar Harbor, and even as my father fends off a knife wielding thief at a Dairy Queen in the middle of the night in the middle of nowhere, and as I take a rock to the face at a rodeo in Oklahoma.

Each road trip ended at home in Atlanta. A place that, besides our summer tours of the U.S., I never left until taking a theatre scholarship at the College of Charleston.

In the summer of 1999 I moved to Manhattan for four months to attend a summer film program. Most of my education came from the city itself. I took on the city alone. Some predicted it would eat me up, but in turn I ate up the city.  For the first time in my life I was given the chance to completely immerse myself into, what was for me, a foreign culture. I amazed myself with how easily I assimilated.

At the end of that summer I returned to Charleston and quickly finished up my final year and graduated with a B.A. in May 2000. My college years were successful. I had been elected President of Center Stage, the campus theatre organization, and appointed to the Dean of the Arts Student Advisory Board at the beginning of my senior year.

Afterward I returned to the place of my birth with no intention of staying. I simply planned to save money and focus on graduate school. I worked accounting temp jobs with various Atlanta-based companies including Turner and Racetrac Petroleum. Eventually I stumbled into an arts center that I had frequented in my youth and where I had first fostered my love for theatre. Shortly after meeting the new coordinator I was offered a part-time job, which ended up being the start of a seven year tenure with the Cobb County’s Cultural Affairs Division.

Although I started my career intending to peruse theatre as a profession, I quickly realized that I had a rare skill set. My educational focus on theatre gave me event planning and logistics coordinating skills, ease at public speaking, a love for presentation planning, and a very comfortable customer service approach. These qualities were coupled with a skill set I inherited from my family which included attention to detail, organizational, mathematical and problem solving skills. This set of skills has proven to be a successful asset for Cobb County and then later for the State Department, who I applied to on a whim in 2007 only to be snatched up immediately.  

However, it has not been all work. The passion I have for life overflowed in 2005 when I met Serena, a newly returned Peace Corp volunteer. We fell in love, quickly married, and began a family. We are now the proud parents of a four year old boy named Grayson, who is learning more and more about Serbian language and culture every day, and a nine month old boy named Gilliam, who was born in London during my wife’s maternity medevac.

These days I’m a long way from being that little boy in the back of the station wagon. But at the same time, I’m now the dad with the obsession with Willie Nelson. I could hear him singing at my first flag ceremony, I can hear him singing during my R&R’s, during my son’s birth, and when I wipe the tears from my wife’s face as I’m about to board a plane to Pakistan for a year.  We’re always ‘On the Road Again’ and we would not have it any other way.”

BTW: The part about my dad fending of the knife welding thief at Dairy Queen is 100% true (as is everything I wrote in my narrative)… and the rock I took to the face in Oklahoma probably explains quite a bit.

Day 820: The Return of Montevideo?

Continuing from yesterday’s blog entry, out of the six posts to contact me in the last week, the most interesting was the email I received from Montevideo yesterday.


Originally, Montevideo was my #1 choice, however, by the time I had a phone interview with the Deputy Chief of Mission (about a week before Paramaribo worked out) it had dropped to #3 or #4.  The interview went great, the DCM was very nice, and although she made it clear that I was a solid candidate, she was afraid that the timing of my departure from Pakistan hindered my chances, especially since I didn’t already speak Spanish.  If they went with me, the combination of my Pakistan departure date, home leave, and language training would have left the position in Montevideo vacant for six to eight months.  This was a perfectly understandable reason to pass on The Schutz.  So, I forgot about Montevideo… until yesterday, when I received this:


“Mr. Schutz, this is to inform you that your Montevideo bid is still under serious consideration.  With that in mind, we would like to know how we rate with you.  That is, would you be able to rank Montevideo among your bids for us?  Thanks.”


WOW!  Right?  I was floored.  I was pretty much told they couldn’t offer me the job, but now this.  Either they were having a hard time filling the position or they liked what they got back from my 360 review (reference check).  


So, just as I do for all the posts who have reached out to me, I always write back to say ‘thank you:


“Thank you for the email.  Once upon a time Montevideo had been my number one, but when I interviewed for the position with the DCM, it sounded like my timing and lack of language were insurmountable obstacles.  In the end, I accepted an early handshake to Paramaribo.”


Then I got this:


“Hi John:  Thanks for your message.  When you get a little more time in the FS you will see that very few administrative obstacles are insurmountable.  I’m delighted that you’ve found a nice situation for yourself.   Good luck.”


Lol!  No truer words have been spoken.  If only Montevideo knew what I did to get Paramaribo!  

Day 819: Bidding Interest

The bidding process for State Department jobs is pretty funny.  Except for when they tried to take Paramaribo off the list, I was pretty relaxed about the whole thing.  I wish I could say the same about Serena.


Serena was a woman possessed, and why not?  I wasn’t just applying for a job; we were also choosing where we were going to live for the next three years.  However, Serena wasn’t really worried about WHERE we’d end up… she was just obsessed with me getting a handshake.


Since I’m coming out of Pakistan, I’m eligible for an ‘early handshake’ (job offer).  Normally, posts are not allowed to offer jobs until after the bidding cycle ends, which is always mid to late October (and that date is normally pushed back to sometime in November).  However, for bidders eligible for ‘early handshakes’, we can be offered jobs two weeks into the bidding process, early to middle September.


When ‘early handshake’ season opened, Serena went crazy.  She couldn’t understand why I hadn’t been offered a job… she couldn’t understand why posts weren’t getting back to me… and she spooked herself so much that she started reshaping our bid list ever two or three days.  Wanting me to reach out and send my resume to more and more posts.  


Now, I am an incredibly lucky man to have a wife as supportive and confident of my talents as Serena.  However, at one point I had to tell her that I wasn’t going to contact any more posts for at least a week, if not two.  We had to chill.


I had a theory.  Out of all the countries in the world, only the folks serving in three are eligible for ‘early handshakes’ (Iraq, Afghanistan, and Pakistan).  So, was it realistic to assume the hiring managers for other countries knew or even cared about ‘early handshakes’?  No.  Posts are not required to give ‘early handshakes’ to interested parties… so why would they?


As a manager ‘early handshakes’ don’t make sense.  Why would I offer you a job before I had a chance to see the entire applicant pool?  So, this is why I had to call a time out… we had to chill.  And a few days after this is when everything worked out with our #1 choice, Paramaribo, and we received the coveted ‘early handshake’.


Now, that’s not the end of the story.  The most interesting thing that has transpired in the last week, as bidding season is drawing to a close, is the number of posts who have contacted me wanting interviews: Six, to be exact.


Well… I think we’ll be a little more relaxed next time.

Day 794: The Handshake

So, if you read yesterday’s post about my bidding woes, you’re probably wondering what in the world happened as a result of my #1 choice, Paramaribo, being removed from my list... without my permission!


Well, I’ll tell you.  But first I need to share a couple things I’ve learned in my short time with the Foreign Service:


1)  There are no rules… there is only interpretation of rules and folks tend to make things up as they go.  


2)  No one really cares about you.  If you’re not going to be an advocate for yourself… then you should just go home.


Now, I’m not saying these things because I like to be difficult or cause problems… it’s just true.  It’s no different than when I called AT&T to cancel my cell phone service before moving to Belgrade.  The first person I spoke with wanted to charge me an early termination fee to cancel my phone lines.  So, I hung up.  The second person wanted to charge me again.  So I hung up.  The third person said ‘You are a loyal customer and we’d hate to lose you.  I’m sure you’ll be coming back to the States periodically, have you heard of our Military Suspension Program?  You are eligible for it.’  GOLD!  Sign me up!


In short… the answer is out there.  If there is a solution to a problem that seems reasonable, it probably exists… you just have to talk to the right person.


So, when Paramaribo disappeared from my list and when most people would have picked a new #1… I rallied.  


I contacted Washington and started asking them very pointed questions:


“Why was Paramaribo taken from our list when there were six active bidders?”


“Did you know two of the six bidders are currently serving in Pakistan and are supposed to be given priority bidding?  Do you know where the other four bidders are currently serving?”  - I wasn’t lying, there were two bidders from Pakistan… a friend of mine was bidding Paramaribo a her #2.


 “Shouldn’t employees coming out of the big three posts be given the courtesy of bidding uninterrupted on their top picks?   If this is what the department means by priority bidding, I find the process very disheartening.”


Yeah, I milked it.  And you know what happened?  Washington contacted me.  They said, ‘Listen, we’ll contact Paramaribo.  If they’re willing to offer you a handshake immediately, it’s yours… if not, it’s going to an entry level candidate.’  It was obvious they wanted to shut me up.


And what do you think happened?  Hmmm… let’s role play.  I’ll be Paramaribo and you can be Washington.


Me: So, let me get this straight.  I have the choice between a middle career candidate who I have already talked to and like, who has a strong resume I’ve already read, who actually WANTS to come to Paramaribo.  Or!  I could pick an unknown entry level candidate who’s forced to come to Paramaribo.  


You: That is correct.


Me:  Hmmmm… let me think about this for a--- We’ll take JohnPaul.


Match, point, handshake.


We’re going to Paramaribo!

Day 793: National Update Your Resume Month

ARG!  September would HAVE to be ‘National Update Your Resume Month’, huh?  Right, smack-dab in the middle of bidding for State Department jobs!  Updating my resume is all I’ve done for like… What?  A month!


Now, I’ve complained about bidding before… but now?  Now I have some serious things to complain about.  And I hate to come across as a complainer.  But… this bidding madness is crazy-town.


Okay, since we last talked about bidding my list has completely changed.  I dropped Montevideo down from my #1 position and started bidding hard on Paramaribo, Suriname.  I know what you’re thinking, “Where.”… or “Why?”  What can I say?  I’ve served in Belgrade, London, and Islamabad.  I prefer hardship posts… and the kids are young and we don’t have to worry about schools right now, so it’s time to cash in on a Service Needs post.  Service Needs designated posts are ones that are hard to fill… usually because they aren’t glamorous… and there in the middle of nowhere.  Well, at least Paramaribo has a first run movie theater (which is more than I can say about Georgetown, Guyana).


So, believe it or not… there were six people biding on the position in Paramaribo… and would you believe I was their #1 candidate?  Well, believe it!  I was bidding hard and working it.  Now, since I am coming out of Pakistan, I am eligible for an early ‘handshake’ (job offer)… jobs can’t actually be offered until bidding seasons ends in mid-October, BUT for folks like me, posts can offer their jobs early.  Early handshakes are rare… but I was greasing the wheels… getting myself into position… and then. YANK!  Washington’s pulled it off my mid-level/mid-career bid list one month into my lobbing.  


GONE!?!  Paramaribo?  Gone?  What the?!?!


So, I did a little digging.  I had to know why it was taken off the list.  Did post remove it?  Had they found someone they liked more than me?  No.  Did the Bureau remove it?  No.  So, what happened?  


Well, as it turned out there was a larger number of new hires this summer than previously anticipated… and Washington hadn’t earmarked enough positions for them.  So, in the middle of bidding they took a handful off my list and gave them to the new hires as directed assignments.  “Oh no you didn’t!”  Oh yes they did!


Before I continue, you should know a little something about volunteering to serve in Iraq, Afghanistan, and Pakistan.    They try to sell you on this idea that you’ll have priority bidding for your next post.  That you’ll pretty much get first dibs or at least an upfront shot at what you want.  Some folks are able to get what they call a ‘linked’ assignment, which means when you volunteer to go to one of the bid three, at the same time you bid on where you want to go afterwards.  Essentially, you get to bid on posts a year early… so the only bidding competition you have are the other folks going to one of the big three posts.


For whatever reason, I was not eligible for a linked assignment.  AND, I received no support or assistance with the bidding processes.  So, be able to cash in my Pakistan chip became quite difficult.  I was pretty much told by the same people who promised me the world, ‘you have to bid just like everyone else and when you get a handshake let us know.’


Seriously.  No help.  And when I found out they removed my #1 choice from my list.  Needless to say.  I was less than pleased.

Day 761: A Break for Bidding

Okay, “The Chair” is going much longer than I had originally anticipated… which is cool… I am totally in the zone and I am diggin’ it… I hope you are too.  Heck, I’m so engrossed in my own transcendental meanderings (and National Friendship Week) that I completely and totally missed International Suit Up Day, www.suitupday.com.  Will you ever forgive me?  Can we celebrate together next year?  Why would you say that?  I would never forget International Talk like a Pirate Day.  It’s going to be legen--- wait for it—DARY!

Ummm… yeah… sure… huh… nothing could be more appropriate to follow that, then a little shop talk… business… the bane of my existence: Bidding. 

If you are not familiar with the word ‘bidding’ in the context of work then you’re probably not associated with the Foreign Service… or your probably one of the few responsible folks who do all of your eBay shopping at home.

In the Foreign Service, ‘bidding’ refers to the process of choosing our next assignments… our next jobs… our next homes.  It all sounds very glamorous, huh?  Ummm… no.

You see, ‘bidding’ isn’t really bidding at all.  It’s applying for a job.  How do I know this?  Well, the last time I bid on anything, I wasn’t asked to submit an updated resume, references, and an appropriate time for an interview.  These things never happen on eBay!  And most importantly, when I have the winning bid, I’m never invited to go work for the auctioneer!  That happens when I’m offered a job that I apply for. 

And that is what the folks in the Foreign Service do best: apply for jobs.  We’re good at it.  It took a year and a half from the time I submitted my first application to the day I completed all of the rounds of competency test, medical test, security screening, interviews, and flaming potato catching and actually started my new job.  It was intense!  When was the last time you had to pursue a job for a year and a half?  I know!  Crazy-Town!

So, yeah, it totally makes sense… if it takes a year and a half to get the job… why not reapply every two to three years just to keep your job!

.

Okay, I’m better… really I am… . 

Folks, let’s all have a set on the carpet and talk. 

Basic, basic, basic low level Human Recourses ‘THEORY’ states the following:  If two people hold the same position and are of the same pay grade/seniority, in theory, they should be interchangeable.    

What do I mean?  Well, if Grayson and Gilliam are hired as Political Officers and Grayson is a Grade 3/Step 2 and Gilliam is a Grade 3/Step 1 … then Grayson is the more senior Political Officer.  However, if Grayson and Gilliam were both Grade 3/Step 2 Political Officers, theory would suggest they were capable of doing the same job.

However, no one likes to be part of a theory… or thought to be interchangeable… especially in the Foreign Service, so we’ve added an extra layer to the madness.  In order to show his dominance, Grayson must now use his resume, references and superior interview skills to make himself look better than the rest of the Grade 3/Step 2 Political Officers all over the world.

Oh, and there is also another more shameless and somewhat shady side to bidding… it’s called “cashing in on your friendships.”  If you happen to know someone who once knew another person who worked for the guy who used to know the woman who once shared a bagel with the person in charge of hiring for the position you want, then, you can cash in a favor and have all those folks announce how awesome you are and how great of an addition you would be for the Embassy you want to work in.

BTW… have I mentioned my bid list yet?

1.       Montevideo, Uruguay

2.       Panama City, Panama

3.       Lima, Peru

4.       Tallinn, Estonia

5.       Geneva, Switzerland

6.       Brussels, Belgium

Do me a favor… tell them I’m awesome!

“Oh, no he didn’t!”

Oh, yes I did.

Peace out my little Happeners! 

Day 16 – Post Assignments

By JohnPaul

Okay, I know… I haven’t written in a while… but I thought I would wait until I have some real news. Here it is, short and sweet.

We’re going to Belgrade, Serbia!

Day 8 – Pack-Out Blues

By JohnPaul

So… our pack-out got totally screwed up today. Between me and Serena we received five confirmations about our move… or more importantly when the movers were coming. They were supposed to come today to pack the house in boxes to get it ready for the movers who are coming tomorrow. In theory, once the house is packed it should only take the movers a couple hours to load the truck. Well… I’m not sure how that is going to go since the packers didn’t end up coming today. Or at least we cancelled them when it got to 2:30pm and still no sign of them. To add insult to injury, my mom volunteered to entertain Grayson for the day so Serena and Anita could coordinate the move. So now, for tomorrow, Anita is on Grayson duty and Serena has to meet the packers at the house at 6:30am… because the movers are still scheduled to be at our house with the truck at 9am tomorrow morning. Brilliant, huh?

I did have a funny conversation with the packer today… at around 5pm, when he called me to confirm for tomorrow. He was like “they called me around noon. I was on my way to pick-up the truck and my crew around 2:30pm when they told me not to worry about it today.” He sounded very confused. I was like, “well you were supposed to be there first thing this morning. I’m not sure why you didn’t know about it until noon… since your company has been confirming with me for the last two weeks.” He didn’t seem to be very with it. But, all in all it is our fault. When we met with the VERY “with it” moving company rep for our pre-move consultation he asked us what kind of customer service needs we wanted to make sure things go well. He used examples like timeliness and movers that don’t smell… Serena and I being new to this world of having movers didn’t say anything. In hindsight, I hope the movers are lathers up with deodorant tomorrow… for Serena’s sake… since timeliness doesn’t seem to be a strong point.

Take care,
-JP