Day 793: National Update Your Resume Month

ARG!  September would HAVE to be ‘National Update Your Resume Month’, huh?  Right, smack-dab in the middle of bidding for State Department jobs!  Updating my resume is all I’ve done for like… What?  A month!


Now, I’ve complained about bidding before… but now?  Now I have some serious things to complain about.  And I hate to come across as a complainer.  But… this bidding madness is crazy-town.


Okay, since we last talked about bidding my list has completely changed.  I dropped Montevideo down from my #1 position and started bidding hard on Paramaribo, Suriname.  I know what you’re thinking, “Where.”… or “Why?”  What can I say?  I’ve served in Belgrade, London, and Islamabad.  I prefer hardship posts… and the kids are young and we don’t have to worry about schools right now, so it’s time to cash in on a Service Needs post.  Service Needs designated posts are ones that are hard to fill… usually because they aren’t glamorous… and there in the middle of nowhere.  Well, at least Paramaribo has a first run movie theater (which is more than I can say about Georgetown, Guyana).


So, believe it or not… there were six people biding on the position in Paramaribo… and would you believe I was their #1 candidate?  Well, believe it!  I was bidding hard and working it.  Now, since I am coming out of Pakistan, I am eligible for an early ‘handshake’ (job offer)… jobs can’t actually be offered until bidding seasons ends in mid-October, BUT for folks like me, posts can offer their jobs early.  Early handshakes are rare… but I was greasing the wheels… getting myself into position… and then. YANK!  Washington’s pulled it off my mid-level/mid-career bid list one month into my lobbing.  


GONE!?!  Paramaribo?  Gone?  What the?!?!


So, I did a little digging.  I had to know why it was taken off the list.  Did post remove it?  Had they found someone they liked more than me?  No.  Did the Bureau remove it?  No.  So, what happened?  


Well, as it turned out there was a larger number of new hires this summer than previously anticipated… and Washington hadn’t earmarked enough positions for them.  So, in the middle of bidding they took a handful off my list and gave them to the new hires as directed assignments.  “Oh no you didn’t!”  Oh yes they did!


Before I continue, you should know a little something about volunteering to serve in Iraq, Afghanistan, and Pakistan.    They try to sell you on this idea that you’ll have priority bidding for your next post.  That you’ll pretty much get first dibs or at least an upfront shot at what you want.  Some folks are able to get what they call a ‘linked’ assignment, which means when you volunteer to go to one of the bid three, at the same time you bid on where you want to go afterwards.  Essentially, you get to bid on posts a year early… so the only bidding competition you have are the other folks going to one of the big three posts.


For whatever reason, I was not eligible for a linked assignment.  AND, I received no support or assistance with the bidding processes.  So, be able to cash in my Pakistan chip became quite difficult.  I was pretty much told by the same people who promised me the world, ‘you have to bid just like everyone else and when you get a handshake let us know.’


Seriously.  No help.  And when I found out they removed my #1 choice from my list.  Needless to say.  I was less than pleased.

Day 792: Turn Off Your TV Week?

It's 'Turn Off Your TV Week'?  Come again?  Have you ever heard of such a silly thing?  Preposterous!  As you know, I have a healthy appetite for television… and when I’m away from my family… the appetite increases tenfold!


When I’m not at work, blogging, or baking casseroles… I’m probably watching TV… or doing push-ups… but probably watching TV.  


And there is nothing wrong with that… so please forgive me for not recognizing Turn Off Your TV Week.


Now, if the initiative was called something more like, ‘Force your kids to get some fresh air so daddy can rewatch the conspiracy episodes of X-Files… or Twin Peak’, now you’re talking!  I can get behind that holiday!


So, what will I be filling my time with as I desecrate 'Turn Off Your TV Week'?  Well, I’m on a British and Canadian TV kick right now.  I’ve been watching ‘Being Human’ which is a BBC show about a vampire, werewolf and ghost sharing a flat (seriously… I don’t think I could have made that up); ‘Death Comes to Town’, the 10 episodes Canadian mini-series that reunited ‘The Kids in the Hall’; and ‘Slings and Arrows’, the Canadian series about a fictitious Shakespeare Festival. 


It should be fun!  


So kick those kids out of the house, pop some popcorn, and settling into the couch for some quality one on one time with you TV!  


Or turn it off.  SEE IF I CARE!


Love you, bye.

Day 791: International Talk Like A Pirate Day

YAR!


It’s HERE!  It’s finally upon us.  International Talk Like A Pirate Day.  Ye better lift a pint o’ ale ‘er else I’ll keelhaul ya!


Seriously folks, if you’ve never heard of International Talk Like A Pirate Day… you really need to get with it.  What started as an inside joke between a couple friends has turned into… well… something much bigger than they ever imagined.  I think it’s hilarious. 


http://www.talklikeapirate.com/


Happy International Talk Like a Pirate Day everyone! 

Grayson Celebrating International Talk Like A Pirate Day... er... or Halloween in 2007!

And the rest of us in 2008!  

Grayson was celebrating International 'I'm Going to Be Batman' Day

Day 790: Oktoberfest!!!

Ladies and gentlemen!


Today is the first day of Oktoberfest!!!!


Lift a pint!  Lift a boot!  Lift a jug!  It doesn’t matter, just lift a beer!


In honor of Oktoberfest, I thought I would share with you a couple links:


Have a Murree with your curry!  That’s the slogan of one of the oldest companies on the Asian Sub-continent.   Pakistan’s own, Murree Brewery:  http://www.murreebrewery.com/


If you think you take beer drinking seriously… think again.  The folks over at ‘Beer of the Day’ (www.beeroftheday.com) have taken to the web to educate the world about beer and their breweries one day at a time… umm… that didn’t sound right... but that’s what they do… they profile one beer everyday!


Enjoy!

Day 789: Floods and ‘Fringe’

The other day, while driving home from work I heard this very moving radio ad calling for the people of Pakistan to band together and donate money for those affected by the floods… and let me tell you… the flooding is crazy bad.  One-fifth of the entire county is underwater.


Well, I’m listening to this ad and I’m thinking, wow, this is a really effective… it is very moving.  The narration and the music were working perfectly together creating a single moment.  


I became captivated with the music… it was so familiar… where had I heard it before?


Then it dawned on me.


The flood relief ad was underscored with the opening theme song to the TV show ‘Fringe’. 


The song was composed by JJ Abrams (creator of Alias, LOST, and Fringe)… I wonder if he aware of his part in the relief effort.

Day 788: The Doppelganger

Okay… so I totally got caught googling myself the other day… but the strangest thing happened.  Number one of the search results was:

www.johnschutz.com

I was like, huh?  What?  That’s not me!  So I clicked…

Could it be?

Is there really enough space in the world for, not one… but TWO John P. Schutz’s?  Evidently, the scary truth is ‘YES!’

I couldn’t resist… I emailed him… and we’ve been emailing each over for a little over a week now… and we’ve even skyped.

Now Serena is curious… she knows of another Serena Newhall running around… should she make first contact?

Do you have a doppelganger?

Day 787: The Chair, Part 33 - The Gestational Period of an Elephant

The other day a very close friend contacted me to tell that the ‘gestational period of a baby elephant’ is shorter than the stories I tell.


Well… in response… I can only say this… it may take an elephant over 600 days to birth a baby… but you can’t rush art!


;)